Adoption Blog

The Home Inspection: What To Expect
If you are adopting, the first step is to get a home study. This is an assessment done by a

Woof, Woof, Meow : Pets and The Home Study.
Approximately 65.1 million household in America own dogs as pets, and 42.7 million of them own cats. If you are pursuing

How To Be A Good Friend To Someone Who Is Adopting
As a friend or family member of someone who is adopting, you may be curious to know what the experience

Got Milk?: Birth Mother’s, Breast Milk & Adoption.
Having worked in the adoption field for several years now (13-ish), I can think of exactly zero times where I

Tell Me A Story: Our 5 Favorite Kids Books About Adoption
It’s a rabbit hole out there on the world wide web when you search “children’s books about adoption.” How can

The Skinny On Post Adoption Contact Agreements
It has been said that all Birth Moms, no matter how close the relationship with adoptive parents, fear that the

The Baby Is Coming! The Hospital Experience For Prospective Adoptive Families
Preparing for the hospital experience is one of the most anxiety provoking tasks for prospective adoptive parents. While there are many generalities of this process, there are also many, many variables that color how this experience will look for you. This includes the specifics of your match and relationship, policies and experience of the chosen hospital and specific staff people involved, and the engagement level of your adoption agency or professional.

Goodbye For Now: The Hospital Experience of One Birth Mom Part 2
In the three days after her birth, I was able to treasure every moment for myself. My family and the staff supporting me helped carry out this desire. I knew going into the hospital that I wanted to love on her as much as I could while she was still legally “mine.” As my social worker once said, these were my moments and the adoptive family would have forever. I took that to heart because I didn’t want to have regrets or should-haves, but instead have precious memories and photos that would carry me during the hard days.

Meant To Be Theirs: The Hospital Experience of One Birth Mother
As my due date neared and my belly grew to an uncomfortably large watermelon size, I felt the tension between wanting to give birth for relief yet also not wanting to face this new chapter. A chapter where I now would be sharing my daughter. The anticipation of both wanting to move forward in time to see her face, to hold her, to watch her family love her, coupled with the fear of the unknowns made my last days of pregnancy tormenting at times. Will they keep their promises of open adoption? Will I see her again? Will I get severely depressed? Will I change my mind when I see her?

Holiday Gifts: A Birth Mother’s Perspective
Even with a fully open adoption and a great relationship, it still can be difficult to pick out the perfect gift for one another. There are still questions of What would they like? What do they need? How can I get something special that they will appreciate or will actually use? I can’t answer those questions exactly for you because every person and situation is unique, but I can give you my perspective of gift giving and receiving over the last 18 years of my open adoption with my birth daughter.

Love Leads
When I placed my daughter in her adoptive parents’ arms eighteen years ago I never dreamed that our relationship would bloom into what we have planted together. We promised one another two visits a year and to always keep in touch, as simple and complex as that can be for busy families. Their promise to me was also a promise to her, and they upheld it with the utmost honor. What was a simple promise has remained through her eighteen years, often in ways far beyond promised, even in the complex reality of what open adoption emotions can bring.

Knock Knock: Adoptive Parents As Gatekeepers
Figuratively upon placement a gate is closed between an adoptive family and their child’s birth family. A birth family must seek permission to access the child. This is the essence of gatekeeping.

The Child Preferences “Checklist”
When coming to adoption and engaging with the Home Study process, you will be asked to fill out a Checklist of characteristics you are “willing to accept”. This is industry speak for the type of child you are interested in adopting.
The Checklist is used as a tool to inform the matching process with an expectant mother and baby. The goal in matching is to ensure the needs of the child and the birth family are acknowledged by the adoptive family, and that the adoptive family is capable of meeting those needs.

Loving Someone Special: World Down Syndrome Day
As a child, regularly being around someone with a disability is many things: enlightening, scary, confusing, heartwarming, curious, hilarious, and both completely like and unlike any other relationship. I found myself processing him and his diagnosis and figuring out how to relate and understand every time I went. As an adult, it is clear to me that the amount of time spent with him greatly affected my own ability to empathize, connect and embrace people, particularly those who may be considered “atypical”.

This Failed Life
This Failed Life: Feelings Of Failure In Adoption & Misuse Of The Term “Failed Adoption” In season 2, episode 2